SO Many Good Developments!

In the last few days I finished Dania's adoption memory box. We really wanted to show Dania that we recognize that she came from elsewhere and has a history before us..even if we may not know much about it.  Hopefully she will appreciate it one day.  Inside, I've included three envelopes for each trips' plane tickets, an envelope of ruble coins, packaging from different foods she and we ate (I wouldn't normally keep food, but it's all crazy russian writing and the yogurt one is creepy!), important documents (our acceptance letters for international adoption, from the province dated Oct 2011; CHOC's application and timeline with all of my handwritten notes; our initial email and pictures from Russia with her info; our court application in English and Russian; the court procedure outline; certificate from CHOC for Russian specific adoption training; certificate from the orphanage for a donation in Dania's name), and a HUGE stack of cards from people all over Canada and the states wishing her a welcome! The memory book won't go in because I plan to read it to her frequently!

I also logged the geocaches that we found, or didn't find but were close to, while in Moscow.  For those who don't know geocaching, it's a worldwide treasure hunt.  People make caches of all different sizes and log the GPS coordinates on an official site.  Every cache has a log that is to be signed and some can have items put in.  Some even have trackable items that can be moved from cache to cache by different people.  Every find or move is recorded on the official website. I had made a trackable item, called Dania, that I wanted to leave in a cache over there that could be seen as her possible route if she had stayed over there.  We could have tracked its every move until it stopped.  Every cache in Moscow was micro sized and I couldn't leave the trackable item (an army tag-like item) inside.  I think I will wait and see what she wants to do with it one day!

We went to Growth Spurts consignment for some shoes and pants and jackets!  Thanks to all who contributed for the awesome credit there and the owner was so excited to finally meet us!  We found some shoes, a denim jacket, and a warm vest that can be worn with her sweater for the cooler weather!

 We also tried Dania at other people's houses this week.  She's never been off her own turf and on another kids'.  She was sooooo good!  After one cranky day, we went to a neighbour's for an adult birthday party.  She was the only kid, so I thought this would be an easy transition to going elsewhere.  She was just like she was at the airport (minus the being tired); she watched everyone for a bit and then started walking around, reaching out to some, and 'talking'.  

We also tried her at a friends' house where there is a boy, E, who is 3 months older and a mountain of toys!  She was quiet for an even shorter bit.  She sat and played with toys while watching everyone else.  She would only walk to me or Mike... but less than an hour later she was EVERYWHERE!  She watched E walk around and (as I'd hoped) decided she didn't need to walk from object to object as much as she has been.  She was going up and down their hall and turning around without even holding her arms out for balance!  It was great!  E even thought she was chasing him! LOL!  Soon, I'm sure of it!  They played together and she felt comfortable going to our friends' arms and was SO proud of herself walking around.  I felt proud watching her!!!  They even bathed together and she kept flipping herself under the water, as per usual, and I think E thought she was crazy.  They did enjoy splashing together though!  That felt good to see all of this because it's 'routine' for us to go over here on Sundays and play boardgames.  For us to continue this, she would have to feel comfortable enough to go down for sleep in her pack 'n' play.  We wanted to ease into it, of course, and will try for even longer next week - as long as she doesn't have a cranky day tomorrow!

 She has also started making a face that looks like Leia (our dog) who has a major underbite because she is missing her top teeth in the front!  I first saw Dania make this face after looking at Leia so I figure she is mimicking the dog! LOL!

 Playing with E!

 

Doing the 'Leia' in her new denim jacket.

 

I will Keep Blogging...

...just not as frequently!  I promise though!  I like doing this for me too, it gives me a chance to regroup thoughts and vent any bureaucratic frustrations I may be having, although, hopefully, those should be few and far between now!

On Tuesday, I emailed CHOC digital copies of all of our documentation and that 'closed' our file - other than the post placement reports that will come over the next 3 years.  I also emailed them to our provincial government and the international adoption lady said she would love to speak with me and hear my story.  I also told her we would love to be part of any panels and be references for anyone that is working with Russia.

Speaking of reference, someone found the blog because of searching for the specific orphanage.  It fills me with joy to think I could help future people looking to travel to this region!  yeah!

We also took Dania to my family doctor this week.  She needed to be assessed and have the required testing done here in order to be referred to the oral surgeon, a pediatrician, and an ophthalmologist.  My GP was quite impressed with the medical history we were able to provide - all of her tests, vaccinations, dates of treatments, supplements or medications she has been given.  It took me several hours to translate that myself... I had written it all down but I thought it would look better if it was formatted to match the Russian document that was notarized.  He loved her and thought she was doing quite well!  We then went to get her chest x-ray and blood work and she was really good during all of that too!  She, or course, cried at the needle but she calmed down as soon as it was done and we started moving around.  I think she was more annoyed that she couldn't move her arms as opposed to in pain from the needle.  She likes to touch things!

She also had an out of sorts day on Tuesday, but I think that was because my mum had left the eve before so it was a change in her routine.  She was used to seeing Gramma when she ate and played and all of a sudden she was gone.  She was better the next day.  Let me tell you, this transition to Canada could not have been done without my mum!  Not only did she become a laundry machine, but Mike and I were both sick after we landed and all three of us were messed up with the time changes!  She was wonderful!  If I had given birth I would have wanted her here so I couldn't imagine having it any other way when I got to bring Dania home!

Things are becoming routine-ish for us.  I say ish because nothing is ever set in stone with kids.  Mike and I each have our own outside-of-the-house activity, dodgeball for Mike and the pantomime for me, and we are working really well together.  She is beginning to display frustration when we limit her actions or say 'no' to going somewhere or touching something she shouldn't.  Perfect!  We first had to teach her that she could try to do things on her own and go places on her own, so she has learned that, now she has to learn boundaries!  She IS a fast learner.  Clever girl...

singing 'la la la' in the mirror

the had I crocheted for her.

enjoying some 18 month birthday cake!

  I don't plan to celebrate all of her monthly birthdays, but we didn't get to do her first with her so forgive us for letting her eat the chocolate cake! hahaha!

7 Nights and 7 Days

Well, it has been a whole week since landing in Canada.  What a flipping great week!

After getting over the sickness, we have a rough routine that we follow.  I say rough because she still will need more sleep sometimes.  Her train is her favourite toy and she plays with that nonstop.  She likes to 'dance' to the music it plays.  She also has been meeting new people, experiences, food each day and taking it all in good stride.  She has only one 'big' new event each day, or every other day, and she has been enjoying it.  Sometimes, she takes it all quietly and just watches, but other times she will just walk right up to the person and babble. 

After visiting our neighbours' kiddy pool I realized she must miss little kids.  She crawled right over to J, our neighbours' little guy, and started interacting.  She also watched our other friends' little guy when he came over and rode her train all over the place.  The next day she started getting on it on her own and can almost maneuver it around - her legs are just a tiny bit too short.  She does seem to be overwhelmed a little when parting from the kids, but she is such a remarkable kid that she continues to impress me with her resilience and acceptance. 

She keeps trying new food and simply spits out what she doesn't like or what she cannot chew properly.  She likes steak, oatmeal, yogurt, and soups.  She does try to eat a lot with her hands now, which is so great, but she also needs to learn to put her cup down after she drinks instead of pitching it over the side! hahaha!

I crocheted her a little hat that is similar to the ones she wore in the baby home, and it's so cute.  That's my one self-promote thing this entry! 

I made her a photo-book about her journey to us. Only her part as opposed to the many years before her.  This will go in a box I am compiling of her experience.  A memory box to show we appreciate her beginnings to us.  I will also put copies of what is not 'confidential' documentation.  We had to copy all of the documents we brought home, the certificates, the court decree, the application for adoption...everything, and will send it to CHOC next week to close our file!!!  CLOSED!  Other than post-placement reports (at 6 months, 1 year, 2 and 3 years), we do not have to deal with the agency anymore.  That seems crazy!

We also applied for her provincial health care card.  We can do that because we have declared her a permanent resident as of right now.  She will receive her permanent resident card in a few weeks and we will be able to apply for the actual card as opposed to just the number and papers that we have now.  When we receive that card I will also start the next steps in the immigration process.  I am going to call them (now that I have a file number and can get through!) to clarify if I need to resend the forms we already filled out because we didn't have any specific information for her at that time and she was just Child Miklos Bathurst.  I hope not because it's just more chances for it to be mailed back for silly reasons like no signature from my 18-month-old. 

18 months old!  Tomorrow!  That's how old she is!  WOW!  She has probably had more firsts in the last week than she has had in her previous 17 months!  We love her.

She has had one freakout, but we bathed her early and got that calmed down.  Otherwise, a normal day has her waking up and breakfasting, then playing for about 3 hours before a nap.  She will then wake up and have lunch and play.  She might have an afternoon nap but she usually sups around 5:30 and then bathes around 6:30 and to bed around 7:30.  Oh, there was the one night when neither Mike or I heard her cries!  Mum stood in our bedroom door and asked us if we were going to get up or if we were just playing a game with each other to see who would get up first... we didn't hear her either.  We both felt bad when we learned about that!  Hasn't happened since, thank goodness!  That was also the only time she woke up for real during the night.  Thanks Mum!

Her baths are the best!  She throws herself backwards (the first two days had her hitting her head on the tub bottom but she didn't care!) and then rolls over and sits up with water dripping all over her face and she LOVES it!  She does this over and over and it is hilarious!  I will get it on video soon.  We also took her to the lake today and she liked that!  I could tell she was a bit colder but she definitely liked it!  She was squealing and she was trying to walk instead of throwing herself backwards.  I am so glad she liked it because I love swimming and we have that perfect lake right close by!

That smile, when I first walk in in the morning, sets my mood for the day and it is fantastic!

Busy, Busy, Busy

I cannot even imagine doing all I am doing and still having to do all that shopping... thanks again!

We keep receiving wonderfully kind words and help and we are so lucky! 

To just give a quick low-down on the new stress we were slapped with, the embassy diplomats went on strike in a lot of the major cities, including Moscow.  I had an email from the lady at CHOC who I keep dealing with (and it was a tad rude, but we won't get into that now since it is being dealt with) that basically said we have to check to see if we are going to experience delays because of this.  Eff that!  Isn't that part of what we are paying her for?  Contact with the reps over in Moscow who would have a better ability to find out this info?!?!  Either way, S has the email of the contact in Moscow from their previous adoption so he emailed her.  It shouldn't be a problem, still 4 business days for the visa, because of the situation.  Thank goodness for his contact with O in Moscow! 

Also, the apartment rental people are beginning to get on our nerves too (when I say our, I mean all 4 of us) with a few little things.  As S said, "there's always a little excitement, isn't there?"

I have ordered the money, washed all of her and our clothes, started the pile of what we need to take, scanned our travel documents again for registration, put new items 'away' so that we can get rid of all the garbage and packaging before she is in the house, rescheduled all appointments, gave my friends a tour of Halifax, and continually email S in Richmond Hill about everything, and dealt with the stupid responses from the two parties I mentioned earlier. 

My list is about half done, which is good because it's halfway through the time we had! 4 more sleeps!!!

EMAIL CONFIRMATION

Hello Jessa,

 

We finally got confirmed your date of Court and travel dates.

 

Your Court date is July 24^th at 10:00AM and you have to arrive to Ufa on July 19th or 20^th any time as your host family will be meeting you at the airport. You may leave Ufa for about 40-42 days on July 25th later afternoon.

 

A new law regarding adoption has been accepted yesterday in Russia therefore it will change the schedule of trip 3rd.

 

It is 10 days mandatory waiting period after the Court now and 30 days required to get passport for adopted child. Therefore, you will be signing an additional Power of Attorney there in Russia before Court for our reps and they will be able to get a Court decree in 10 days after the Court and apply for child’s passport and other documents. You will return to Russia for the 3^rd trip in 40-42 days after the Court. You will get passport and other documents for your child, pick up the child and may leave Ufa to Moscow (you need 2-3 days in Bashkortostan to do that). In Moscow you would need 4 working days to get your child registered with the Russian authorities and get your child’s immigration visa at the Canadian Embassy.

 

Once you have your flight itinerary for this 2^nd trip please forward it to us so that our reps know when to meet you at the airport in Ufa .

 

Let me know if you have any questions.

 

Sincerely,

 

  CHOC

More Information

I now have a better idea of the procedure for the rest of this process.  The original information package we were sent, and which I keep referring to, was when there was only a 10 day wait after court and now there is a 30 day appeal so I was confused and asked for clarification.

2nd Trip
About 8 days in Sterlitimak and Ufa.  We need a few business days to be at the orphanage, and then we go to court, then we spend another day signing whatever we need to sign.

30 days Later

3rd Trip
About 4 business days in Sterlitimak/Ufa and 4 business days in Moscow.  I thought she had said we go to Moscow on the second trip for court.  I see now, we just have to go to register her with the Russian authorities and get a Canadian Visa.  So, 3rd trip is a bit longer than I thought, but she is still ours on that trip so there is less anxiety hahaha. 

This is what I just gathered through email with CHOC.
The reps, during our 2nd trip, might say things a bit differently though.  We will wait and see... oh, big surprise, waiting...

The Movement is Moving More

I just got an email from CHOC saying the signed letter has been notarized and is on its way to Russia!  Yeah!

I was also out with a friend to find a dress for her and I found a great dress for court!  I wanted to wear a dress as it would be cooler than pants and a blouse, but I needed the right type so it looked presentable but not over/under suited for the occasion.  I have sun dresses and dresses for weddings... nothing in between.  I also still wanted it to have personality because I don't want to look dour or dowdy.  Hopefully I will wear it soon!

We also purchased a bedding set for the room.  It's water animal themed, has an octopus, seahorse, turtle etc on the comforter.  It was a super deal online and I figured that wasn't a jinx item because we will need sheets and blankets no matter what.  It will match with the walls in the room and can be adjusted to any age or easily made more "girly" if someone wanted a girly-girl room *cough* mermaids *cough*. 

Here's hoping for a court date for my birthday present from Russia!

Movement.

Holy Moly!  The first month after our visit flew by!  The last two weeks?  CRAWLED like a dehydrated snail!

I had emailed CHOC a few times and asked if there was a standard notice time, ie. if our appointment was July 20, would we hear 2 weeks before?  3 weeks? 

There is no standard.  Blah.

I had a little cry on a cousin's virtual shoulder yesterday.  I miss her more than I let on.  I'm sad because I'm forget the way she feels and sounds and smells.  I want to bink my nose on hers to make her giggle.  I want to be her mother, dangit!

That aside, today we received an email from CHOC saying that the embassy has received a letter confirming Dania is eligible for immigration!  Yeah!  This letter, unbeknownst to us, had to be processed in London, England and then sent back.  So, four different recipients along the way, in 4 different time zones, makes for a long transaction.  This letter states that there is nothing medically that should exclude Dania from immigrating.  With that, and the Letter of No Objection from Canada, we should be good to get our date soon!  I didn't even know we had to have this other document.  It makes sense (now) that they wouldn't schedule a custody hearing for a child if they are unaware if she is allowed to immigrate!  She is!  Yeah!  So, we signed the document and just posted it so CHOC will receive it on Tuesday and then they can send it off right away.

The downside to today's email... I have been SO organized and on top of the dates of our documents and what needs to be done and payments and everything!  I blew it!  HUGE!  $6000 huge!  To go into financial detail of this process (just for the fees, mind you) the agency fee is $6500.  That pays for the people at CHOC, their time, their building, their knowledge and their trust.  There were a few fees on top of that for individual documents, etc.  The Russian fee is $18,000 USD.  First, we sent the agency their fee when we started the process and sent them our full application.  Our second lump of $6000 was made when we sent our completed home study, and therefore our approval from Canada, to CHOC for them to translate and send to Russia (hence the Russian fees).  The next chunk of $6000 was upon acceptance of a proposal, so, this was done up in November with the first proposal, and then sat in the bank until we were ready to actually go over.  We handed that to the Rep in Ufa, for her to pay Russia.  Now, in my own pitiful defence, Mike was in the same frame of mind as me.  We've paid 18000... not remembering that the first lump was for just the agency... GAH!  I feel awful that I let that get overlooked.  Our guardian angel helped again, big time.  The cheque has been written, and by Tuesday the funds will be there.  I feel like the asking for the final chunk of fees means that Russian wheels are turning... this will be lawyer fees, court fees, translator fees, the social worker who observes us for a day, etc, etc, etc... always more etc...

Big breath.

It's in the mail, it's being handled, it's never going to feel like we can thank the people who have helped us out enough!  The extra support is unbelievable and so, so appreciated.  As I said in a previous post, I imagine sending thank you cards from her when this is all said and done... and that scares me to think that because she's still not ours until 30 days AFTER court. HOPEFULLY!

Letter of No Objection

I received an email from CHOC saying (my heart was beating soooo fast because I thought 'this is it!') that they have received the 2 Ontario references with the new dates - thank you for your expediency - and also a Letter of No Objection from our provincial government.  This was the last big ticket item needed for court.  It basically states that our province and government recognizes we are pursuing this private adoption, they have looked at the child's files, and they have no problems with us raising her as our own.  It felt really good to see that.  Affirming.  I would post a photo but it says right on the letter that it is only to be shared with us and the involved legal parties due to the sensitive info contained within.  Just know it has a big shiny seal and our names and Dania's name!

The rest of the references and the last two documents needed will be in the mail tomorrow.  Boo ya.  Prepared.

Now, give us a court date for next month, puh-leeeeease!

More Paperwork...

...it never ends!  As a matter of fact, it won't end until 3 years after the adoption is finalized!

I woke up feeling like this is the week we will hear (so, we probably won't).  I also knew we had gathered a bunch of documents last summer around the start of the Olympics, which means at the end of next month they would all expire in the eyes of Russian court.  I emailed CHOC to ask about these and she sent me back 7 pages of documents that need redoing.  These are letters from employers and letters of reference about our characters. 

I wanted to make this as easy as possible for those who kindly wrote us letters last year in July.  I retyped them (in case they weren't saved on their computers) word-for-word, only changing ages and time references.  I then emailed each reference their letter and asked for them to print them out, sign them, and mail them to CHOC.  I feel bad hounding people again, but (HAHAHA  just got a text from my sister saying she mailed hers just now!) we need to get these documents gathered in case we need to use them.  Gathering them now is important because they will then have to be sent to be legalized and translated (even though they are almost exactly the same!) and then mailed to our lawyer in Russia.  CHOC says we will gather these and hold off on getting them legalized until we have the court date, because if it is between the 10th and 20th of July we won't need them. 

My cousin pointed out that Murphy's law has been all over this process!  She predicts that the date will be just after August 1st since that is the latest dated document we are redoing.  I figure we won't hear for another two weeks, CHOC will send them off to be legalized, we will pay for that, and then the date will end up being on time and we will scramble to get flights!  Over prepared is still better than not at all and having to wait even longer.

The other couple messaged me today asking if I had heard.  They know we are ahead of them so as soon as we hear they should be hearing too.  He still reminded me that even he was told between the 20th and 25th of July, so that's still not too far away!  Although, Vladmir did say that the next appointments after that time aren't until October! GAH! 

I am REALLY starting to feel antsy about not having a date...and I swear it's been ever since I called it her room upstairs!  THIS is the worst waiting because I have a face, a plan, but no definitive point to look towards!

The Next Steps

I have printed many photographs so I always have them on me to show people!  Now, that wasn't a necessary 'next step' but I did need a few to send to CHOC and 10 for us to take to our court hearing.  We are also encouraged to bring some of us with Dania to add to the album we gave Dania, this way she can look at her with us too!

I printed the photos.  I informed our provincial government of the success of the trip and that we are waiting for a hearing date.  I sent CHOC the child information form we had to fill out for the embassy in Ottawa.  This form is so we get a "No Objection" letter from our government, which is a must for the hearing.  I also sent in the last quiz for our training and we will be scheduling the date for our last video conference soon.  I found a dresser for Kid's room that will be perfect.  It popped up on kijiji today and I was lucky enough to see it early; we will be picking it up tonight.  That means Kid's room is complete!

We will also be working on our court statements over the next week.  We want them to be perfect and my problem will be saying WAY too much because I just love her that much!

Day 4

We just left the orphanage for the last time this trip.  Kind of a perfect ending so there were no tearful goodbyes:

 I was singing "I've Just Seen a Face" and she just leaned in and relaxed completely and fell asleep!

We are now going to nap and then head to the airport for Moscow.  I will go into all of the boring details I didn't provide yesterday lol!
First, as we were waiting for Dania to be brought to us this morning, we see a train of kids coming down the stairs (they have a railing specifically for tiny people on the main staircase!) and I make eye contact with the child at the head of the line.  It was HIM!  He has fairer hair, and even his eyes look lighter, but I knew it immediately.  He smiled and said 'hi' in Russian.  Then, outside, he kept running over to us.  I didn't feel a tug in the heart or punch in the gut as I expected I would.  I was just happy we saw him and he looked so happy to be running around outside.  And boy, did he run!  He was the kid that had to keep yelling at to make him come back!

I'm not sure if the home study is still being done on his mother, but CHOC said he wasn't on any registry now.  Either way, he looked happy.  All of the kids do, actually.  It's nice.  They were all outside playing with their little groups of 4-7 kids.  The orphanage psychologist was walking around taking photos and she even took one of the three of us.  The inside of the orphanage has nice bulletin boards, much like an elementary school, with photos plastered all over.  E was pointing out all of the Canadian adoptees to us!

Ok, so, the details.  First of all, I think CHOC is confused about things.  Either they don't understand how things work over here or they keep getting the cases confused and giving us the wrong info.  Most of it is the same procedural info, just wrong cities.  This trip is the ONLY time we go to Moscow.  Court is in Ufa.  The only reason we have to go to Moscow is for the clinic appointments that we have tomorrow (that are the only thing making me feel barfy now).  Also, we do not bring Dania to court with us.  Just photos of the three of us interacting.  CHOC sent me all the fee lists for Moscow and listed it as needed for trip two, so you can see how I was confused!

Yesterday, we went to the notary and gave power of atorny to V, our lawyer, so he can pick up or request any documents, make signatures, appeals, speak for us, etc. while we are in Canada.  He then went over the format of the proceeding.  First we are all introduced and we say we trust our lawyer and translator.  Then the translator makes a declaration that they understand what it is to provide a false translation.  Then we state our purpose and say we have no appeals to change our case as stated.  It is all very formal and to the point.  On our side of the room will be us, our translator, A, and our lawyer, V.  The other side will have the prosecutor, the inspector (aka, social worker, who will observe us three together one day next trip) and the director of the orphanage speaking on behalf of Dania's interests.  After all of the introductions the judge asks us for our statements.  We have been given templates to follow as she will be looking for specific points to be made.  Mike speaks first and his is very informative of our living situation, why we are doing this, what annual income is, the basics to it all.  My speech is more about the child and our visits (aka, the emotional speech).  Then the prosecutor's side states if it is Dania's best interest to be adopted or not (by the way, we found out yesterday that Dania's mother is currently in prison.  Our rep here, E, looks at us and says 'well, that's good for us! lol!) and the inspector says her opinion as to whether we were seen to be a good fit.  We show the judge our paperwork showing our request to visit the child in the baby home, our request for formal adoption.  We state what her new name will be and request permission for the new birth certificate. The prosecutor side will show the papers that terminated parental rights of Dania's parents, and that no other family accepted the offer of her.  They will also be showing her medical files here.  Once all this is done, the judge asks us for our final word.  We basically say that we love her and want to include her in our family.  Then the judge will go to her chambers, go through our file, 10-15 minutes V says, and comes out to make her ruling.  

That's it.  Today, E,A,and V are taking our signed request to the ministry of education and it will be forwarded to the supreme court of Moscow for approval for court.  When the minisitry gets it back is when we get our official date.  V says it should be between the 10th and 20th of July.

 Here is a full shot of her outside outfit!

Our second trip should have at least 4 days before court, for us to spend more time with Dania.  Russian law states 10 days are to be spent but V says it can be give or take a few.  These days will get us reacquainted with Dania, and allow the inspector to come visit.  We are also encouraged to bring photos of her spending time with us to add to her album that we left with her tutor.  We are also supposed to schedule one day after the court date in case the hearing needs to be pushed back a day (this has only happened once, due to illness of the judge).  So, if all goes well tomorrow and at court, at this point she is ours providing there are no sudden claims from her family.  We then leave and V will gather up all the proper documents, get Dania a passport, and we come back in 30 days to bring her home.  

Yes, mum, she pretty much has all her teeth and I think she is obsessed with the size of mine...

We were given a lot of paperwork regarding how to behave and what to say or not to say in court.  Pretty straight forward.  We were also warned not to be alarmed at her new name on the birth certificate since, like ours, it isn't a direct translation as there are sometimes no latin characters for our English pronunciations.  I never would have known!  We were told never to ask questions of the prosecutor's side, even if prompted, because it may show that we are not familiar with Dania or her case.  We shouldn't be alarmed when they read out her medical file because there are several different Russian words for everything and it may sound different from the ones the doctor at the orphanage said to us.  There was more, but it will all be mentioned in future blog posts with specific details when they occur.  

That is it for now.  I may or may not post in Moscow until the airport home.  I am glad we have the extra day now since we will not be returning on the next two trips!  Hopefully tomorrow goes smoothly (BARF!) and I look forward to being a tourist for a day!

Our family, hopefully!  It already feels like    

                                                                                                                                                    one!

Reservations Done

Booked our apartment for the stay. 

http://www.booking.com/hotel/ru/weekend-apart-arbat.en.html

This seems like a newer place because the reviews aren't numerous, but the ones that are there are great.  Plus, it's within walking distance of the Red Square, the Kremlin AND our medical appointment offices.  We may still have to pay the agency for a driver the day of the medicals because I think they come with us as a translator, but we might not have to for sight seeing - if it is still daytime. 

The google streetview shows the building covered in scaffolding and construction, that's why I think it's new.  The signs under the scaffolding change from the still shot to the street view exploration.  I hope the walking is straightforward.  I will have to explore that more now that we have a location.  It looks like people would walk from this area because all of the apartment and hotels say "within walking distance of the Kremlin."

I also ordered our foreign funds today.  It should be available the week before we leave.  I gave them extra time because we need 'like new' bills for all of the US currency.

Small steps each day.  Here we go again!

Assignment #1

Please write down 3 – 5 sentence answers to the questions below and e-mail the completed assignment to me:

1. What has drawn you to consider the adoption of a child from Russia?
2. What do you know about the adoption of a child from Russia?
3. Do you know someone who has adopted a child either from Russia or from another country?
4. If so, what has been their experience?
5. What is your fantasy of the child you would like to adopt?
6. How do you imagine your adopted child fitting into your family?
7. What challenges do you think you may face adding a child to your family?
8. What do you think may be some of the challenges for your adopted child?
9. What life experience or knowledge do you have that makes you feel prepared to manage these challenges?
10. What behaviors or problems would you consider intolerable, unacceptable or beyond your capacity to manage?
11. What if your child manifested some of those problems, would you still be committed to them?                                                                                                                                                             So, I am an over achiever and wrote WAY more than 3-5 sentences.  I went back and edited my answers to not look crazy LOL!  It took me two hours!  I never had to think about my answer, just started typing.  I love this.  I'm leery about publishing my answers because I share other people's stories to which I have no right to publish.  I will save everything for Kid though.  There will be no hiding our hopes and fears and dreams for Kid!

More Training

Russia has set forth regulations for adoption training more specific to the Russian regulations. The course has to be minimum 30 (and up to 80) hours of training with
certificate, and a confirmation should be provided that the provider of
the courses is authorized to conduct them (copy of the provider's
license/authorization letter).  

Topics to be covered include:
*The decision to adopt internationally
* What is international adoption like for a child?
* Building the family together and resolving emotional issues
* Understanding and building attachment
* Managing behavior and building new skills
* Addressing educational issues
* Parental survival skills
* Professional medical and psychological help for your child

Luckily, CHOC has designed a course specific to Russia and it can be done via Skype.  They will be contacting us when they set up a time, hopefully over several evenings ora few weekends.

In the meantime, I have made our budget... more than we thought.  Sigh.  I don't understand why flights are more now than at the end of last year. I over guesstimate always' though' so maybe it won't be as bad as we think.

No tickets booked yet, but we probably leave one month today!

New Dates

May 13 is our new appointment with the Ministry in Ufa!  I am so glad we are in the middle of the month and not at the end.  CHOC is now looking to make our clinic appointments in Moscow for the 17-ish.

Time to make new budgets and order foreign currency and prepare to meet Dania!l

GAH!

The visa centre guarenteed that we will NOT receive our visas in time for our appointment on the 24th.  I am so upset. GAH!  Russia and Canada need to fast track their communications for situations like this - no espionage anywhere near us!!!
Mike spent some time on the phone with the visa centre so we are 100% sure we cannot do anything to rush receiving them before the 24th.  TWO DAYS!

It's ok.  Breathe.  Think of the Counting Crows song that you were crying to in the car on the way home from work today, "Round here she's always on my mind.  Round here, hey man, I got lots of time."

CHOC has emailed their reps that this appointment must be changed and the visa situation is completely out of our hands.  Of course, I freak out and think this will count against us somehow.  I had to email CHOC back and make sure Dania wouldn't be re-proposed to a couple that could make it there sooner.  Mike spoke with our rep at CHOC and said she was very empathetic to the situation and new we must be upset that this couldn't work our right now.  I was too upset to call and talk! 

Better now.  Breathing now.  Stomach not in knots waiting to see if our visas will make it. 

I am pissed because I was going to make up our budget of US cash and Roubles needs tomorrow but now I fully can't because I don't know how many days we will be needing to pay translators, housing, drivers, etc.  GAH!

Our hope is that we can keep our medical appointment on the 29th and make that the beginning of the trip.  That is a HUGE hope though since Russia goes on vacation May 1 - 6 and the 9th.  We would need a whole stable of horses' horseshoes up our asses! 

What progress has been made?  Well, Mike and I both got our HIV tests for the visas.  We also got a few other tests so we can hopefully save a bit of money at the medicals in Moscow.  Mike was able to get a chest x-ray too so that should help too; maybe with the extra weeks I will be able to get one too.

I will keep schooling and keep crocheting and hope that the next appointment is not too late in May - I just want to meet you Dani!

GAH!  More waiting!

ps.  The meow mix song does nothing.  This glass of wine does though...

Determination

Now that the dates are "set" I feel like this is more real.  We are playing it safe and waiting until we have a better idea from the visa centre about timing before we purchase tickets.  I feel like it WILL work though.  I have this over riding sense of determination.  It was not apparent the first time because I was so excited and naively happy with the situation.  Now, I'm a bit smarter and I know what could happen, there is this determination that is growing from the pit of my stomach.  I want this to work SO bad!

It may sound like I'm setting myself up for heart ache again but, if Dania does fall through, I will have learned something else besides caution and trust in fate.  I will probably curse fate and not know what this new found knowledge is until I calm down and stop hurting, but I will have learned.

In the meantime, I have been trying to firm up our budget for the first trip.  We will need to buy Roubles to pay for the clinic in Moscow and we will need US cash for everything else.  I have asked CHOC to double check that no fees have changed with the turn of the new year.  She will return the info to me on Wednesday.

I also have a doctor's appointment to obtain the blood work requisitions for my rushed HIV test and for the other possible Rouble saving tests we can get here for free. 

I also keep monitoring flights.  They are more expensive now than at Christmas - what the?  The money difference is not as big of a setback since, hopefully, we will not need a return ticket for Kid!

Tight Timing

Holy Strombole!  We received confirmation that we can have our appointment with the Ministry of Education on the 24th and our clinic appointments on the 29th.  That is all good.  The hard part is guarenteeing our visas will be here in time for us to fly there.  They sent an email saying we wouldn't receive them until the 28th.  Mike got on the phone, because I am so stuffed up I sound like a muppet character, and told them our situation and how I was previously told that if we had them in the mail asap the 18th would be fine for a deadline.

Right now, our passports are at the Russian Embassy in Ottawa waiting for the invitation to create the visa.  The invitation takes about two weeks to firm up.  The guy on the phone told us to start calling around the 10th of April and putting the screws to them because that is when the process could be hurried up.  Once the invite is received and we have met all the criteria (including an HIV test for this kind of visa! what?!) the visa is then created, imprinted into our passport and mailed back to us (there is a same-day option for mailing.  So, next step:  We go get blood done this week and then email the results to the visa centre once we have received them.  Then we start calling.  Then we book flights for the 21st or 22nd of April to arrive for the 24th appointment.

Holy Hannah this is tight!

Waiting, Waiting, Waiting

Still waiting for word about the medical appointments.  CHOC says as soon as they know we will know.  What is going on over there???  CHOC is currently closed for Jewish and Christian holidays so the email checking is not as frequent as it usually is, but still, I know this has to be something over in Russia or CHOC would have told us to start booking.  Maybe they are trying to get the clinics to reschedule things?  Who knows?  All I know is I wait... and I'm sick as a dog too.  Although, I'd rather be sick now than in a months' time when we have exams from 8 different physicians!