Reactions

When this process started I was warned by two people to be wary of judgement and negative reactions from those who don’t agree with my choice to adopt internationally.  It never crossed my mind that people would be anything but ecstatic but I guess that is a valid concern considering the family dynamic is a touchy subject with so many.  I am lucky that no one has expressed any prejudices about cultural differences or pressing me to do everything medically possible to keep trying the “normal” way.  I am also pleased that I have had four family members offer to maim or harm anyone who is opposed to our process!  And each offered to carry this out in a different manner… I have creative and loving guardian angels for Kid already!  Although, there have been a few guarded reactions.  I don’t see my announcement any different from if I was announcing I was actually pregnant.  I wonder if those guarded reactions would have been so if that really was the case.  See?  Family dynamic is a touchy thing.

I feel that if you are happy for someone it doesn’t matter.  I have spent the last few years celebrating all the majority of friends and family members announcing pregnancies and bringing life into this world and the whole time I knew it would be difficult for me to conceive.  I hope like hell none of you were guarded with your own excitement when telling me!  It doesn’t matter my situation because it was yours in the spotlight.  I can honestly say I never once felt sorry for myself after your announcements.  I feel sorry for myself when I see idiots out in public manhandling their kids or clearly neglecting their kids’ well-being because those idiots do not deserve kids and I do!  I was recently told by an expecting friend that there was nervousness when telling me but my reaction took it all away because I was clearly happy for him!  Bring on the stories and photos because I love knowing my friends are happy!

So, I wonder if those who felt the need to stifle their celebration with me for the sake of others can put themselves in my shoes and understand that, after years of trying and all the comments and questions about 'when are we having kids?' and constant negative results from doctors but watching what felt like everyone around me have joy, that I have earned this feeling of elation and I am not hiding it from anyone.  I don’t bring it up constantly or only talk about this subject but I already know that having this light at the end of the tunnel to look towards has put a spring in my step and an enthusiastic twist on everything I do; the same as I would be affected knowing I was pregnant.  My family dynamic does not see it as different; Mike and I are still going to be parents!  Just like the song most of us learned as a kid: if you’re happy and you know it, clap your hands!  And I’m clapping damn hard!